I am feeling a bit off the past four days. I got involved in something online and have been angry about it for days. I cant even give details on it because I use my real name on this blog. Let’s just say people online are truly psychotic and think they are not, and it is one of the biggest problems online.
As far as my faith goes, it is a push every day. I can say though that sometimes in a few moments, I can feel a presence of God that feels kind and loving but either it does not last long, or I am busy and don’t keep up with it.
The more I pray in tongues, the more attacked I get from the enemy. Doubt creeps in and I feel stupid. Then I pay attention on another level to how I feel in regards to the spirit and that is different. You feel a weird connection. Praying this way does something on a deep level in the heavenly realms.
There was a guest speaker at the church again last week, and he said he felt a bad presence around him one time, and started speaking in tongues and it left.
I think I can pretty much carve it in stone that honestly the reason tongues is so odd and you can’t understand it is simply because it is true: The spirits and Satan cannot understand what you saying to God. So people make fun of it and think it is unnecessary even though in the Bible that is what it meant by “intercession”. It didnt mean he prays for you in the literal sense, without tongues in normal prayers, it means praying in tongues is intercession. I am prompted to pray sometimes and do not know why.
I keep reading story after story of people who was prompted to pray and it ended up saving someones life, or their own. It is a protective mechanism against warfare, and in the armour of God, the word intercession is used at the bottom.(Eph 6:18)
I am still trying to grasp who God is and it is going a lot slower than I thought.
Last week, he had me read Psalm 139 and wanted me to reflect on it, but I kept telling him: I get it, sort of, but I need something personal.” I feel like God wants a lot of work in regards to the word, but some of have short attention spans and its not easy.
I dont know what to write sometimes, I am a work in progress. This week is a mess, so writing a detailed post is out unless something big happens, and sometimes it does.